Monday, December 7, 2009

Ok the bed is here!



So the hospital bed finally arrived....I am not sure what hospital and what time period they stole the bed from but it is certainly not the hospital bed that he had at the City of Hope. Well we will have to see if this is the normal protocol. I don't know maybe people have never complained about the beds before but REALLY!!!! I guess they have never meet me before. I will keep you posted on the 1950 bed. So that being said once I find out about the bed situation I will have to move him down stairs. Once he is downstairs I know that he will never go upstairs again.....never sleep in our bed, never take a shower, never put his clothes on the floor and never complain that the 90 lbs puppy is on his feet. How do I move him downstairs? Is it really the right thing to do? Should I leave him upstairs but have him in the hospital bed? So many questions I hope that I can find the answer soon. That being said if anyone has any suggestions feel free to let me know.

Love,
Hallie

PS I have added picts of the bed...

11 comments:

Jackie said...

I struggled with this very thing. Over and over and over. We had a great hospital bed, so they are definitely out there, you need to complain about safety.
Did you get it through hospice? If so, they should replace it easily, if not, then when you get to hospice they will want to replace it with "their" bed. I have more experience with this, but will save you the drama. Just let me know and I will elaborate.

We don't have a bedroom downstairs which means Bill would have been in the living room, which means he would lose all privacy, if there is such a thing in this nightmare. There is NO dignity in any of this. I (like you, I'm sure) have done and seen things I never thought I'd do or experience.

I also (at the time) felt like I needed him in the same room with me, for safety reasons. Thank God I kept him in our room. We had major issues with him trying to get up.


I knew he'd never go back down once he was regularly in the bed... and I was right. At one point of clarity (which didn't come often) he was upset about never leaving our room and not "seeing" downstairs ever again. Just thinking about that conversation makes me cry because my heart broke that day. It was a realization for me that he was dying and then the fact that HE KNEW he was dying.

I just can't say it enough... I'm so sorry you have to endure this. Bill was 42 (I am 33) and it is just wrong that our young lives warranted these horrific decisions.

I would be more than willing to talk with you or e-mail or meet you for coffee, or whatever. It sometimes helps to talk with someone who has lived it.
I am thinking about you ALL everyday!

Jackie
jacbartak@sbcglobal.net
http://bartak.blogspot.com

The Seldons said...

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
Henry Ellis

You are amazing Hallie!

Anonymous said...

Hallie I recommend that you trust your heart! Do what you feel is best for you and your family. I am praying for you and your family.
Chrissy Nigrelli

Anonymous said...

Chrissy is right...you need to go with your gut and do what is best for you and your family....don't do what you think you should, do what you want and need to do. You are so amazing and strong, you may not feel that way, but you are! My love and prayers are with you, Eric and Hunter.
Love, Karen (CHS)

Anonymous said...

Hallie: I say follow your heart - I'm with your friends Chrissy and Karen. Do what makes YOU feel better about the whole situation. If keeping Eric in your bedroom feels right then do it! Be selfish Hallie and do what YOUR heart tells you. You are the most amazing wife and I continue to admire you and what you are doing. As always, you are all in our prayers. Hang in there and thank for taking these precious moments of time and keeping us updated.

Love,

Liz Miller

Anonymous said...

Hallie your questions will be answered. Now is the time to lean on your friends.

For my Dad who died of pancreatic cancer we made the family room into his room. We just moved my parents bed out to the family room so they could still be together (just a thought). We had hospice for my Dad. Great organization.

Friends are God's way of taking care of us.

We love you and keep you in prayer..karen schue

Anonymous said...

Is there room in your bedroom for your bed and the hospital bed? It may be possible to put the hospital bed next to your bed (even if we have to move furniture). Just say the word and Steve and/or I can come over and check it out.

God bless all of you!

Todd

Anonymous said...

So, what exactly is wrong with something from 1950? But, you are right, it looks pretty ugly. I know some staff have sent emails to your school address, so be sure and check those.
Miss you, and wish I could do something. I remember I wished that life was like a VCR and I could fast forward through the yukky stuff. Unfortunately, at times like this, it seems to be slow motion. I remember having to take 15 minutes at a time, and if I survived, then I could do the next 15 minutes. Then I was up to working through an hour. For some unknown reason, God is allowing this to happen to Eric, and He is allowing you to have to suffer through this. When I looked back upon my journey "in the valley of the shadow of death", years later I did see some positive things that happened. Yet, I still wish I had what I lost and could pass on my new knowledge. You will get through this. You are an incredibly strong woman, and this is one reason that you are surviving this.
All my love, and hugs, and wishes to you all,
LCS

Anonymous said...

Hey Hal,
Just wanted to let you know, I went through the same thing with Caleb. Demand a fully electric bed! They will give you one. They start out giving you the cheapy one, hoping you won't ask questions. Each time, they delivered the electric one after the fact. I know it sucks, I've done it at least 5 times with Caleb's surgeries. Beyond the bed situation, you are the strongest person I know. Your in our prayers, for strength and grace. Your are fully loved! All of you.
Love, Shana and Family

Anonymous said...

Dear Hallie,

I agree that you trust yourself, there is no right and wrong. I have no words of wisdom, just my deepest thoughts and prayers. I can tell you Hospice is an amazing organization, my dad just passed on December 3rd. My sister and I cared for him, with the help of hospice. Be good to yourself Hallie, you are truly admired by many. I pray that God, family and friends provide everything you need. I only wish I could shoulder some of your pain and saddness. Take care and know that many people or thinking and praying for you and your family.

Sincerely,
Trina Pina

Anonymous said...

Whatever you decide, upstairs or down...don't think that it is the last time that he will be up or downstairs. Eric has over 200 firefighters fighting for him that move people for a living and we do it with the greatest of care and ease. With that said, you let me know if you or he want to be moved and we will be there in a heartbeat to move him whether it be for a few hours or a few days. We all want to help in anyway we can with whatever we can.
Whatever you decide we are here!

My Cell (909) 228-7352
With love, Renee